Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Master Billy Quizboy

To ease the recruitment process for the holie corps I have made a short multiple choice quiz for all new perspective applicants:

1) There is a Large Warp Disruption Bubble placed on a high sec exit hole that is a nuisance, you want to destroy it in your Amarr stealth bomber. Do you:
a) Position yourself inside the warp disruption field.
b) Position yourself about 15km from the high sec hole.
c) Equip explosive ammo.
d) All of the above

2) You and your three buddies are running a cosmic anomaly, you notice on D-scan a Vagabond appear, a Badger MkII turn into a wreck and the Vagabond disappear. Do you:
a) Continue running the site, there are four of us and he posses no threat.
b) Continue running the site, only total newbs fly vagas. PWNSAUCES!!!!
c) D-scan?!? Is that like an 8-track!?!
d) All of the above

3) You are returning to the group in question #2 in your dominix after the sleepers destroyed your thorax. Upon arrival at the entrance hole in high sec there is a Typhoon, Brutix and Hurricane waiting at the hole. The pilots are all members of a well known griefing alliance. Do you:
a) Wait for a Drake to join them.
b) Recommend your friends continue to run the site.
c) Watch them jump through and warp to your friends’ site.
d) All of the above

According to field testing last night, the correct answer to all of them is d) All of the above.

If you don’t understand why answer c to question 1 is funny, then you have no business flying Stealth Bombers either.

There is of course a story to these questions. That’s right, I came upon a SB who was trying to destroy a large warp disruption sphere that was blocking a hi sec exit hole. He was about 15km from the probe AND the exit hole. He must have gotten himself a team of PVP experts together to analyze where the worst possible spot to stay perfectly still was, because he was there. Amazingly he ran out of ammo ( I presume) ran out to highsec, reentered and went back to the same terrible spot to keep working on the tower. Thus, he specifically chose this spot. Please educate me, why would an amarr SB use exp ammo in this situation? As far as I can tell WDBs have no resists.

I was poking in and out of a hole all night, eventually there was a couple destroyers guarding (maybe?!?)a badger mkII when some other guys (friends!?!) started running a site. They didn’t seem to mind each others presence, even when I blew up the mkII. After that fight the thorax in the site group blew up and warped to high sec. In the mean time I gathered up a SN wrecking crew and were preparing to warp in on the site crew that was no looting. While sitting at 0 on the outside hole, the thorax pilot came back in a dominix. We stared at each other for about 30seconds when our fourth pilot showed up and we all, including the domi, jumped into system and warped to the site. None of them seemed to be aligning out or were prepared for us. Due to the distance we warped in at, we could only point one of them. The joke was almost on us when the exit hole collapsed from weight, but I had another high sec hole probed already and the last few of us made it out seconds later.

If i didn't mention this kill, one of my readers would lynch me, we waited about an hour for this guy to finish running his site, it was painful. My alt has a kill!!! It was also Necro's first PVP kill, way to go dude!

Sunday, August 1, 2010

They call him Larry

I’ve had a good string of luck lately. I engaged two Itty 5s on a hole, being guarded at the time by three combat ships (one in high sec). The only logical thing to do was come back and kill one of the guards too. In terms of luck though, most importantly I haven’t been killed in a wormhole since December of 2009, that’s almost 8 months. In that time I have amassed 142 wormhole KMs. Not too shabby, but it all ended today.

I was wandering through a system that had been dead for at least an hour when a Hurricane piloted by, “a total newb”(I was getting cocky) showed up in system, his character was about a year old. I was tracking him down when a pod and three haulers showed up on scan and warped to the hole. They looked like they were just outside of jump range so I engaged and for some reason set orbit on the hole at 15-20km. I got one of them and their pod, but the hurricane showed up and I was, stupidly, sitting at 15km from the hole. As I motored to the hole he put me into armor. As luck would have it I was attending to other things and over shot the exit hole…. noooooo I thought as he put me in my pod. I warped off and out to rebuild my bomber.

I screwed myself that fight why I didn’t orbit the hole at 2500 like I usually do is beyond me. It turns out Larry Lowblow is no newb at all, in fact he popped Nerbert not long ago, RS seems to have met their match. I traded a 3M KM and a pod for a 100M bomber, well done Larry.